God of the Gaps: A Word about a Very Special Worm

I said last week, “In the kingdom of God, it would appear that many of God’s gifts lead to win-win scenarios—the more that forgiveness, wisdom, love, patience, peace, and kindness (to name a few) are shared, the more we have.” The implication is that many of God’s gifts are only realized experientially. We want God to zap us and make us holy, kind, patient, loving, wise, etc.; instead, God gives us chances to learn holiness, kindness, patience, etc. by being holy, kind, patient, etc.:

We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption ... the redemption or our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently. (Romans 8:22-25)

Many of God’s gifts are only realized developmentally. We want to wake up one day and be a new creation; however, we are being re-created bit-by-bit:

A man went to Wahab Imri and said: Teach me humility.”

Wahab answered: “I cannot do that, because humility is a teacher of itself. It is best learnt my means of its practice. If you cannot practice it, you cannot learn it.”

(The Spirituality of Imperfection, p 185)

God can humble you, but only you can make yourself humble.

Matt 18:1-4

Commentary

v3 change. Frequently this verb is translated as turn or return (Matt 5:39; 7:6; 9:22; John 12:40; Acts 7:39; 13:46). In the KJV, occasionally the verb is even translated “converted.” What is required is a major course correction—a change of heart, a change of mind, a change of action. Without such a change, the disciples are not even close to the kingdom of heaven.

v4 humbles. There are a wide variety of definitions for humble, but humbling oneself usually entails reigning in one’s pride (Matt 23:12) maintaining a modest opinion of oneself, or behaving in an unassuming manner (Phil. 4:12).

Application

St Augustine said, “It was pride that changed angels into devils; it is humility that makes men as angels.” We live in an age of superlatives—the best, the fastest, the greatest, the worst—but the hallmark of humility is the absence of comparisons:

For humility signifies, simply, the acceptance of being human, the acceptance of
one’s human being. The is the embrace of the both-and-ness, both saint and
sinner, both beast and angel, that constitutes our very be-ing as human.
Beginning with the acceptance that being human—being mixed (and therefore
sometimes mixed-up)—is good enough, humility involves learning how to live with
the take joy in that reality.

As a spiritual experience, humility contains its own unique paradox: Those who think they possess it most often have no idea what “it” is. As a Sufi saying suggests: “A saint is a saint unless he knows that he is one.”

One day a rabbi, in a frenzy of religious passion, rushed in before the ark, fell to his knees, and started beating his breast, crying, “I’m nobody! I’m nobody!”

The cantor of the synagogue, impressed by this example of spiritual humility, joined the rabbi on his knees, saying, “I’m nobody! I’m nobody!”

The [custodian] watching from one corner couldn’t restrain himself either. He joined the other two on his knees, calling out, “I’m nobody! I’m nobody!”

At which point the rabbi, nudging the cantor with his elbow, pointed at the custodian and said, “Look who thinks he’s nobody!”

(The Spirituality of Imperfection, p 186-187)

The rabbi in this story was no less prideful for thinking himself a nobody. A false humility (“I am nobody”) can be just as prideful as thinking that you are somebody. If the hallmark of humility is the absence of comparisons, then humbling ourselves demands that we are willing to live in the middle—to not be special. More importantly, humbling ourselves demands that we are willing to let others live in the middle, knowing that they are neither the best, nor the worst. (Honestly, they may be better than we are, but we must refrain from that comparison as well.)

Is mediocrity OK then? Is this a license to slide as a Christian? Can we get away with giving God less than all our heart, soul, mind, and strength? Of course not. However, we must rid ourselves of the illusion that God’s word addressed to us as individuals makes us better than the other pew-sitters to our left and right. An addiction counselor once said, “The alcoholic’s problem is not that he thinks, ‘I am special.’ Nor is the alcoholic’s problem that he thinks, ‘I am a worm.’ The alcoholic’s problem is that he is convinced: ‘I am a very special worm.’” (The Spirituality of Imperfection, p 190) We err as Christians thinking that some insight, some answer to prayer, some epiphany has made us into “a very special worm.” We are not special because of a job that God has given us. We are not special because of some insight that God has shown us. We are not special because of some spiritual gift. We are special only because God has loved us—we are valuable because we are valuable to God.

Now, in humility, considering yourself no better than the person on your right, the person on your left, or the person absent from church today, go love that person. If they are valuable to God, who are you to say they are of no value?

The Discipline of Humility:
Seeing with Compassionate Eyes

If the hallmark of humility is the absence of comparisons, then how might we get away from judging one another as good or bad? Consider the following:

 Recognize that, since no one is perfectly good or bad, no one can be good or bad perfectly. Even as you are offended by another (or by yourself) what is that person doing well?

 Mentally healthy people have no self-destructive impulses. When you suspect yourself (or others) of going the wrong way, ask, "What is motivating them to go in that direction?"

 Frequently we are offended by the things we hate about ourselves that we see in another. Even as you are offended by another, how does that person remind you of yourself?

In learning to love another, learn to treat yourself more humanely!

Points to Ponder

Does any child really think they are the best at anything? They enjoy playing all sorts of games, taking all sorts of challenges, trying on all sorts of new roles. What young boy playing ball has not tried to imitate his hero? Children know they are not the best, but they are willing to try just about anything. Only adults say, “I cannot do that. I’m no good at that.” How might this fit into Jesus’ comments about receiving the kingdom of God like a child?

Our value is based on the fact that we are valuable to God; hence life is sacred. What does this suggest about the current debates in Congress about rationing health care based on one’s age?